It started out with a meeting with one of my clients. It was about goals and expectations. It�s my group�s responsibility to keep a close hand on the budgets. The clients, on the other hand, just want a free hand to spend at will. They�d like to just hit the go button and fix it later. You can�t budget that way.

Also, it doesn�t help that my team is pretty lame. Not one of them is in any shape to carry the ball on their own without having their hand held. It�s a mess.

Then I had another very similar meeting with another of my clients. I use the word client loosely because they�re internal departments but we�re a service department to production, so to me, they�re clients. Well, that one went the same way.

Then I met with the real estate agent to put in an offer on that condo we saw on the weekend. I just got a call from her telling me there are five offers on the place. For sure, we�ll be caught in a bidding war. I�m not gonna play, so I think we�re toast on that place.

That�s OK. We�ll just have to keep looking, I guess.

I went to see a psychiatrist yesterday. I think I may have problems with depression. I go through some pretty deep bouts of sadness sometimes. I get all weepy and desperate and stuff. I get really pissed at myself when that happens. So then I just get worse.

I don�t really know what depression is supposed to be like. However, there is some history in my family with it. So�a very special someone convinced me that I should see a professional about it, so I did.

Yesterday, then, was my first appointment with the shrink. I�m sitting in the waiting room and out he comes and calls my name. I looked up and there�s this guy who looks like he�s been in the car crash from hell. I�m serious. He had no face to speak of, one hand was clubbed from so much skin damage and his other arm was a prosthetic.

I followed him into his office and I acted as though he were just another doctor but I couldn�t help thinking how petty my little problems were compared to his. I actually seized up in mid sentence a couple of times because I was thinking how what I was saying must sound so small to this guy.

Anyhow, I don�t think I�ll see him again, not because I�m uncomfortable with the way he looks but I can�t be taking a whole day off work every time I see the doctor. I�ve got to find a shrink near work, is all.

Jeez, these are getting to be whiney entries.

On the other hand, I got to talk to Girlofmydreams today�Twice! God, is she EVER sweet. I don�t know what it is but she has the power to lift me up so high. She�s the best.

And then I got off the train to Luvofmylife�s smiling face. She has an award winning smile. It has ever been thus.

And then we went to the computer hospital to pick up Burt. He�s finally got his new fan and sounds much better.

So�I guess not everything is gloomy.

Arc